Thursday, August 24, 2017

COLLEGE + Anne of Avonlea + Kayaking + Sunrise Hike + Pretty Pictures (#GoodbyeSummer)

Anne had a long meditation at her window that night. Joy and regret struggled together in her heart. She had come at last. . .suddenly and unexpectedly. . .to the bend in the road; and college was around it, with a hundred rainbow hopes and visions; but Anne realized as well that when she rounded that curve she must leave many sweet things behind. . . all the little simple duties and interests which had grown so dear to her in the last two years and which she had glorified into beauty and delight by the enthusiasm she had put into them. She must give up her school. . . and she loved every one of her pupils, even the stupid and naughty ones. The mere thought of Paul Irving made her wonder if Redmond were such a name to conjure with after all.
"I've put out a lot of little roots these two years," Anne told the moon, "and when I'm pulled up they're going to hurt a great deal. But it's best to go, I think, and, as Marilla says, there's no good reason why I shouldn't. I must get out all my ambitions and dust them."
-Anne of Avonlea Chapter 26-

Gosh, college has arrived rather quickly. It seemed, at the beginning of summer, that it would take a lifetime, but its here and there's no avoiding it. I'm scared. Terrified actually. But I'm not alone. Its comforting to me to read books like Anne of Avonlea, and watch movies like The Waltons, because I get to see Anne and Johnboy going through the exact same things I am going through, and its nice to have a friend through it all. (Even though they might be fictional.) 

Anyways, I've had a lovely summer. I went to the fair with friends, took a family road trip to a ghost town with my family, went rafting and kayaking on a river, scaled a mountain at sunrise, went target practicing with my dad, read books, watched all my favorite childhood movies and tv series, drank tea, packed and re-packed for college, slept in, got my hair cut super short, worked on my novel and  had lots of coffee with friends at Barnes and Nobles. Its hard to leave my friends and family, my home town and all the childhood memories I have. I wish I could just hold onto them forever and ever. But the reality is, I can't. It's all going to be hard for sure, and I know I'm going to cry a lot, but I'm excited at the same time. 

My favorite thing this summer would probably have to be the sunrise hike I went on with my mom, grandma, aunt and cousins. We got up at 4:30 in the morning and drove up to the trail head and hiked until sunrise. By that time we were at the very top of a majestic mountain overlooking lakes, surrounding towns and dark, mighty mountains with the sun shining out behind them. It is something I will remember forever, as long as I live.

I suppose I should talk about how my blog is going to change. I will probably not be posting quite as often as I have in the past, just because, ya know, #collegelife heheh, but I plan to post every once in a while, because I love blogging and writing, and I don't want to give it up completely. Also, some pretty big thoughts and plans have been circulating around in my brain for a few weeks now, about how I would like to change the direction, and over all topic of my blog, but I will keep you in suspense, until I actually plan to take action and do it, but now is just not the right time with getting use to college life, away from home. But you might want to stay tuned, just the same. 

This kind of turned out to be a random/lots of little bits of info/quickly thrown together post, but whatever. Enjoy the rest of your summer, peeps! <3


Wednesday, August 2, 2017

I always wondered why somebody didn't do something about that. Then I realized, I am somebody...

I always wondered why somebody didn't do something about that. But then I realized I am somebody... 

The world is full of things we wish we could change. Sometimes we think the world's issues are too big for us. We think, “I could never fix that.” But the truth is you can. We are all guilty of blaming others for the problems of the world. I am constantly hearing adults complain on radio and television, saying things like, “someone needs to fix the country!” or “someone needs to end world hunger!” "someone needs to fix this or that!” But seriously. Think about this. Everyone is a somebody. You, no matter how young you are, can change our world for the better. 

In this post I will be writing about three issues that our generation faces, that have really been on my mind and heart lately, as well as things we, as young adults, can do to prevent them. 


Depression, anxiety, harassment, rape, bullying. abuse and suicide are real things. I won't deny that these things are an everyday reality for some teens living in the twenty first century. I, personally have never experienced depression or suicidal thoughts. Probably the reason for this being I have been home schooled my whole life and have never had to deal with the issues kids in public school have to deal with. But I know people who are public schooled and about how they are affected, by these real, raw issues everyday. Specifically to this post, I'm talking about suicide. 

There is suicide prevention month, hot lines, commercials and billboards. But what are people actually doing to prevent suicide in teenagers?

Adults say they want to prevent suicide in teens. They say they want to help, but then they go produce things like '13 Reasons Why'. I've never seen this show, nor do I have a desire to, but from all the things the news is saying about the recently released Netflix TV series, 13 Reasons Why, its pretty much a dramatic step-by-step guide on how to commit suicide with a whole bunch of other questionable stuff thrown in. I've even read that there have been several young people reported (like 14 and 15 year old's), who have committed suicide after watching 13 Reasons Why. I just don't understand people who say they want to prevent these awful things, but they turn around and produce trash for their teens, that is causing them serious harm. This isn't really something I would expect from people like Selena Gomez who is suppose to be kid friendly, and “a good role model for kids.”

Instead of producing shows that depict graphic suicide scenes, death, depression, anxiety, drugs and unhealthy relationships, why don't they produce shows that show teens their full potential? Why can there be people out there who show teens that they can rise above depression and live, not completely problem free, but happily, and confident in themselves and who they are. These teens just want to feel needed and wanted by their peers and its sad when supposed “friends” can make other kids feel so unwanted, ugly, socially outcast etc. that they would go kill themselves. 13 Reasons Why just makes some teens everyday reality into a dramatized temptation of death and how its “better” than staying alive and having to deal with trash at school and at home. This show is an encouragement to try suicide, not something that draws kids away from suicide. 

If adults won't fix this, we should. That probably doesn't mean we are going to go make our own TV show, but there are little things we can do for our friends who might be suffering from depression or suicidal thoughts. For starters, just let them know you care. We never know what a peer might have going on in their lives. They may have situations at home or emotions that we don't even know about. We might not know their problems causing their depression, but we can make them feel loved just the same. Text them and ask them if they want to get together with you and your friends, let them know you are there for them if they ever need to talk. Tell them you love them and want the best for them. If adults as well as teens just showed people love, we could really lower the suicide numbers in America. 


Yeah I know, here comes another pro-life speech. And with it comes a whole bunch of negative comments from people I don't even know. But I don't care, about how many negative comments people leave on this post. Someone needs to speak up about it. 

I recently read in a new article about a mother in Arizona who pushed her 17 month old daughter in a stroller, into the dessert on the largest American Indian reservation in the nation, and left her to die in the heat. She eventually was sentenced to prison for 20 years for the murder of her child. The prosecutor of her case was quoted, “The child was no doubt afraid and in physical distress, needing the one person who is supposed to care for her the most, that being the mother. 20 years is simply not enough.” The U.S District Judge, David Campbell said that the mother had committed an “intentional, cold-hearted, horrendous killing of an innocent child.” 

This made me sooo mad. Not only about this mother just leaving her child to die, but also about what the judge and prosecutor said. They called this act of heartlessness by a mother, words like “horrendous”, “cold-hearted”, “intentional” and “murder”, which is true, but what I don't get is the hypocrisy in this statement. This baby girl was 17 months old. Her mother left her in a dessert to die. People call it horrible, cruel, and say that a 20 year sentence isn't enough, but they turn around and fight for abortion. What is the difference between this case and that of a seven-teen year old girl who goes into a clinic to have her baby murdered for free after having irresponsible sex with her boyfriend? I don't get this at all. That 17 month old baby's heart was beating. So was that girl's baby who was murdered by abortion. These children don't deserve to die, and these adults who defend women's rights to have abortions don't deserve to get away with this double standard. Is this justice? Is this really what our country is coming to? 

As common as abortion is in our world, there are still things we can do about it that can make a big difference. As I write this, it brings to mind, Faith's post about being pro-life. It was such a touching story about how her family decided to take in a baby who's mother was going to have an abortion. Faith and her family did something about this. It would be nice if there was more people out there who cared enough to the point that they would take other peoples kids into their own homes to save them from a "horrendous, cold-hearted, intentional" murder. But don't you see? We can be those people to. Even if you're just a kid and can't take in a baby, you could go to an pro-life rally in your town, do the 40 Days of Prayer, or get involved at your local pregnancy care center, and most importantly you can pray for the thousands of women who have abortions every day, that they would realize the truth about abortion. Also, for those of us as bloggers, we have a platform. We have an audience that reads what we put out there. What better way to get the word out that to speak up about these issues?

YA Fiction// 

The whole “Rebellion Against YA” thing has been going on in the blog-spheare for a long time. I've loved reading all your rants about Young Adult fiction. Its amazing and soooo exciting  to see my blogger friends doing something about the young adult fiction adults are giving teens to read these days. Its also really sad that us teenagers have to fix this problem ourselves. It just shows us that adults really have low expectations of us. The things that are included in YA fiction now days are issues like rebellion against parents, drugs, irresponsibility, sneaking out, and underage drinking. Adult authors think they are getting down on our level, and that these issues are things that connect with teenagers, but seriously? We can handle so much more. We can handle topics like war and peace, love and hate, pain and joy. Those big topics from the history of our world that would influence us for the better if only they were given to us. These topics might be a little rough, but will impact our lives for good in the end, and possibly change the way we view the world and the people around us. 

So many teens are doing so much about this. I recently finished Camp Nano July, and it was so encouraging to see everyone in my cabin striving for the common goal of producing clean YA for fellow youths. Its just so cool and gets me all hyped up and super excited about my own novel that I am working on as well as everyone else's. I think we are all doing something life changing for the next generation. So, never give up. Keep writing and editing and sending in your manuscripts to publishers because we are making history with our words. 
If you didn't get anything out of this post, please get this. We are all difference makers. No matter if you are 10 or 25 or 75, we can all do something to make our world a better place. What will you do? 

What are some of the issues that you would like to change about our world?

How can you change them for the better? 


Friday, July 14, 2017

for granny su

Yesterday, I had to say goodbye to someone very special to me, perhaps for a very long time. It hurt. It still does. I cried myself to sleep last night, and tried to keep the memory clear in my mind of her house, and that last time I drove away from it. The last hug we gave each other, before I walked out the door, I had walked through so many times over the past year. You see, we hadn't known each other very long, but we bonded, you know?

Something in each of us found the other, and we knew we were meant to be friends. Through our friendship, I learned that the word 'friend' can come through people of all different ages. You don't have to be the same age to be kindred spirits. In fact, she was a lot older than me. Old enough to be my grandmother, but we were so close, and our friendship was the kind that is rare and precious. I remember the day when I asked her to be my adopted grandmother. She looked surprised. She teared up and said she would be honored. She told me she never could have children of her own, and she would love to have me call her granny. I felt so special that day.

Granny Su was the one who gave me confidence in so much, and told me I could do or be anything if I really wanted it. She told me that happiness is a journey, not a destination. And the thing was, I believed her.  Isn't it special to have those people in your life, that if they say something, you know they genuinely mean it? Its hard to leave a person like that. It hurts a lot.

As I am preparing to leave for college, fly from home and say goodbye to these special people like her that I won't be able to see for several years, I am starting to realize that growing up is hard. It brings change, fear, unknown people and places, it brings goodbyes. It brings a little bit of the grim world out to light, and we start to understand about how much the world is really hurting. But in the mist of this is our individual lives. Our own race, our own journey and our own story. I guess I'm just at a chapter right now that brings tears and pain, but I know that the sun will rise again tomorrow, and everything will be alright soon.


Monday, July 3, 2017

we're all still learning. || a poem


don't accept something as truth
just because its coming from someone you respect.
we are all still growing.
we are all still just learning to breathe,
to care,
to see,
to forgive,
to live,
to love.
we are all still learning about what it means to be human.
and each of us have to discover what that means to us,
in our own time.

c.r ryder

emotions on something spiritual