Saturday, May 27, 2017

#May2017 ft. A year ago I was in NYC + graduation + 100 followers! + ironing my clothes with a hair straightener

Awesome Stuff

  • I can't believe that exactly a year ago, I was in NYC singing in Carnagie Hall! See photos from my trip here and here. Good times, good times. 
  • Bringing my math grade up *whispers* right at the end of the year! Sooooo happy guys! 
  •  I GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL! *SCREAMS* #homeschoolersrock
  • Getting fully recovered from NaNo and starting to work on my novel again! Its such an awesome feeling! 
  • I REACHED MY GOAL OF 100 FOLLOWERS! YOU GUYS ARE GREAT! Thank you all for reading my blog, and supporting me! A giveaway coming soon, so keep your eyes peeled! Also, I would just like to thank my 100th follower, Anika! Go check her out! She has a great blog and even sells children's books on Amazon! 
  • Preformed in a graduation recital with two other graduates, and had a blast! 

  • Going to all my friends grad parties. So proud of y'all!
  • My room re-do! Check it out here!
  • Getting excited about being a college girl in the fall, making a school supplies list, going clothes shopping and creating a summer bucket list! 
  • Orange creamsicles. Best creation since toasted bread. 

Not-so-awesome Stuff
  • I was washed my bedding, and was taking it out of the washer and putting it in the dryer when I realized that I forgot to put soap in before they got washed. *face palm* *puts bedding back in the washer with soap* *thinks about all that wasted water* 
  • When I realize that this is soooo me: 

  • That last bit of school you have to get done before summer break, and you just wanna burn up all your books and be finished. 
  • Trying to get out of the car when the 90 mile an hour wind is blowing the door shut. 
Awkward/Weird Stuff
  • Being in a hurry to get out the door, and straightening the hem of my jean skirt (that won't lay flat) with my hair straightener. Some times I worry about my mental health.
  • Julia convinced me to get this stupid mug while I was out shopping.... XD 

  • Pulling up to the coffee shop window in my truck and pushing on the super sensitive brakes *jerks to a stop* then realizing I'm not close enough and letting off the brake, *jerks forward* and repeating the whole process, while the barista just looks at me like "get it together, girl..."
  • When people give you complements and you don't know what to say. 
  • I found these authentic wooden shoes from Holland at a thrift store. I was shocked at the fact that people actually wear wooden shoes. (like omw that would hurt soooo bad) The shoes had an actual shoe size in them, so they were obviously boughten to be worn. Owwwww. Julia: "AND THEY DANCED IN THOSE DUDE"

  • When you try high-fiving someone and they don't notice. 
  • When the radio and a/c my truck is broken, and the only station that works is one that plays classical music. So I'm at a stop light with the windows rolled down (cause there is no a/c) with my classical music playing. *glares from people in cars* I just have to be that girl, don't I? XD But its kind of fun being odd sometimes. lol
  • When a kid is honest about your appearance: Other people: "Awww your so adorable!" Little kid: "You look terrible." 
  • Idk if anyone else does this, but when I'm about to order food or coffee or whatever, I rehearse what I'm going to say in my head, and when I get up there, I get super nervous and I don't say what I was originally going to say. Instead I usually say something stupid....or its totally obvious that I'm nervous, and its awkward all around for everyone. 
  • Realizing I say like 3/4 of these words.... 
April Faves

Julia spoke da truth
Audrey wrote a great post on why every writer should be a beta reader
Mary's characters in this short story are the best!
Micaiah's post about her mom was sooo sweet!
Sarah talked about enjoying the journey
Jonathan made me laugh because all these things are sooo relatable
Randy's poem gave me the feeeelllllzzz
Anika gathered a lovely list of books you should add to your summer TBR

Writing Stuff

Heres another snippet from my novel, Negative Time:

Roman Schneider April 1944

Sometimes the smallest coffins are the heaviest.

That is what my mother told me after my sister went to heaven. She was only a few days old. I remember the very first time I saw her. She came out all bloody, and wiggly. She was smaller than my 9 year old brain imagined her to be, but looking back on it, she was small even for an adults imagination. My grandfather told me, she had been born too early, and I remember my father placing a small wooden coffin in a shallow grave next to the river, on that cold November morning. My mother was so weak after the birth, and died not long after my sister did, and my father, not long after her. In all rash honesty, he killed himself. Suicide. The very next day after her death. My aunt said he couldn't take it anymore. Too much pain. The image that would haunt me forever was coming home from school, to find my papa. He had hung himself in the doorway. One of his shoes had fell to the floor. His eyes where open, his body swayed in midair. I was told myself that day that he never really did love me. He wouldn't have done that if he loved me. I'm starting to believe no body in the whole wide world loves me at all. They all left me. My papa, mama and sister left me, and now aunt and uncle have deserted me at this horrid school. My mother had always told me that no matter what people around me did, God always would love me, but I am starting to question that, or if its true at all. We went to church my whole childhood, but after she died, I don't go anymore. Maybe I should have, just for her. Its funny what we believe about ourselves and God. Regardless of the many times we hear about God loving us, it doesn't really sink in. Well, at least for me, it hasn't. 


*awkward laughing* Well, I don't really wanna talk about goals, cause I didn't finish any of them.... I have been so swamped with graduation and my grad piano recital that I really didn't get time to do all that I wanted to accomplish. BUT, I did read more this month despite all the business of graduation! And I've started making a list of books for summer (since I have nothing else to do), so if you guys have any recommendations, just drop them down in the comments! Ohh, and btw, go read my review of The Outsiders if you want. Its my new fav book...and it will CHANGE YO LIFE. Its the most amazing book I've read it a long, long time. 

Goals For June
  • Get together with friends I haven't seen in a while.
  • Go walking more.
  • Bake a really weird fancy french desert.
  • Make homemade ice-cream with my siblings. 

Pretty much this month was awesome, (I'm soooooo glad to be DONE with school) and I'm looking forward to June! Summer + no school = awesome. Rock on!


Wednesday, May 24, 2017

we had the hearts of dreamers || a poem

we had the hearts of dreamers
but we let the clouds eclipse our light.
we thought we could create galaxies
with the stars in our eyes.
but we were wrong.

we were the broken ones,
we were the ones that were hurting.
we were the ones who put on faces of happiness
when we were heartbroken on the inside.

but life has never been without hope.
we are still alive, and
can still be made beautiful.


for mara & for all of those who have ever felt broken

Tuesday, May 16, 2017

ROOM TOUR || ft. inexpensive room decor + vintage kitchen cart record player stand + pallet bed + diy + TWO MORE FOLLOWER GUYS!

Sooooo yesterday, I decided to clean my room. But I went a little further than that.

I was getting sick of my room looking so messy, and drab (you probably saw some of it in the video included in this post) Ewwww right?! So I decided to add a few changes to my room, and to refresh it a bit for the summer.

In our basement we have a ton of different vintage furniture, dressers, desks, chairs. My mom loves to chalk paint and she collects things from thrift stores and such, so I always have something new to put in my room when I'm ready for a change. She had the vintage kitchen cart you see my record player sitting on in the second photo in our garage, so I just hauled it down to my room, and BOOM, it looks sooooo cute! My desk, is also a different one than what I had before, and was hand made by my moms uncle. The large chest/trunk you see in the fifth photo is my hope chest. I love it so much, because my amazing daddy made it for me about a year ago. Its beautiful and something that will definitely be passed down through my family. Annnnnddd for the pallet bed. My pal over here, made herself one, and I was like "OMW I NEED ONE OF THESE!". End of story.

For my bedroom refresh I didn't want to spend a small fortune on decor, so I went for a simple, diy style that was going to turn out cute, and affordable. I think it worked out great. 

  • Cork Board Wall (photo #1) I picked up a package of four cork squares at Michaels Craft Store for 8 bucks and with some added photos and postcards, I think they add a nice addition to my wall! 
  • DIY Vintage Window Frame Photo Hanger (photo #2) I found an old window frame out in our garden shed, scrubbed it down and attached some twine to the back, where I hung some of my favorite photos. I love the chipped paint look on the frame. 
  • White Canvas Wall Art (photo #3) I picked up a package of canvas's awhile back for around 10 dollars. I needed to add something on that wall, (so my Collabro calendar wouldn't feel lonely. XD) so I just tied some twine around them to make them look like paper wrapped packages, and stuck some fresh carnation's in with the twine. I'll probably end up doing some actual wall art (with paint) later on, but these are fine for now.
  • Typewriter (photo # 4) Evey one is always asking about my typewriter when I have friends over. I got it a little over a year ago at Goodwill for $9! It came with a handy little case and a paper holder! I love the color and the typewriter itself is in great shape. 
  • Record Player (photo #2) My parents got me an old vintage Tele-tone record player for Christmas. They picked it up at a thrift store for 10 bucks! 
 So, how do you like my room? I'm pretty happy with it, and it looks so much better than what it did before!

Ever made a pallet bed?
Favorite part of my room?
What color is your room?
OHHHHHHHHH AND GUYS! LISTEN UP! *snaps fingers* I'm at 98 followers right now! *throws confetti* Lets see if we can push to get to 100! It would mean so much to me, and I might even host a give away, when I reach the 100 mark! *raises eyebrows* Go follow!


Saturday, May 13, 2017

A Mothers Day Q&A Vlog Ft. My Mom

-A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.-
-Washington Irving

Moms are pretty great.

Just think about all they do....they take us to our basketball practices, piano lessons, track meets, the library, they are always there to support us in everything we attempt. They cook for us, they love us, they care about us. So, on this Mothers Day, show your mom how much you care about her. I know I take my mom for granted a lot of the time, but Mothers Day just reminds me how special she is to me, and how awesome she is and how encouraging she is to me! I don't know what I would do without my mom. <3 

What are your families Mothers Day traditions?
Favorite question from the video?


Wednesday, May 10, 2017

be proud of this.

stop pretending life doesn't terrify you.
because it does.
its unpredictable.
its new.
its unknown.

but take a moment, and look backwards for awhile,
and marvel at your life.
at the suffering that strengthened you,
the joy that fulfilled you
the grief that softened you.
and notice that despite everything
you still grow.
and will grow.
be proud of this.


In honor of Mothers Day, my mom and I will be doing a Q&A right here on the blog, so leave your questions for us down below! They can be random, weird, silly or questions about us personally, our dislikes or likes, ect. The more hilarious the better!


Friday, May 5, 2017

#AprilCampNano2017 feat. how i lost by 947 words + snippets + 3 surprising things i learned from camp nano

Yes, I lost Camp Nano. And yes it was by a mere 947 words. EXACTLY. My goal was to write 40k during camp, but obviously I only got to approximately 39k. I wrote pretty much the whole afternoon of the 30th, then I was gone for the whole evening, and was too tired to update..... before midnight, so I just went to sleep. 

Soooooo yeah, long story short! It stinks because I worked so hard to complete my goal, AND I WAS SO STINKIN CLOSE, but oh well. Its not the end of the world, right? XD BUT I WILL CONQUER JULY! But, considering everything else, I learned SO MUCH from camp! I am so thankful for all the girls that where there for me when I needed to war! (I'm still celebrating that I beat Julia in a sprint!) You guys are the best! During camp, I learned self-discipline, and how to make goals and achieve them. I learned how rewarding and fun writing can be, and I am learning so much from my characters! But besides these things, I learned some things I didn't expect. 

1. Allow yourself to be imperfect.

I had the hardest time, just letting loose, and writing. I was so concerned about everything not sounding fake, the plot making sense, and my characters being on spot. But I realized that Nano isn't a competition. I'm not competing against my cabin members for the most words or the best synopsis or plot. My novel doesn't have to be bestselling material. In fact it probably will never be that good, but I just had to realize that everything didn't  have to be perfect. I just needed to write, and not worry about anything else. This is my second book and my first novel, and I've learned so much about writing already during my first month of Nano! Bring on Camp NaNo July!

2. Don't give up. 

Grrr, during the middle weeks of April I. was. about. done. I was seriously sick of meeting my daily word goals, and just sitting down and writing in general. ITS MENTALLY DRAINING. But, now that its over, I am so glad I kept writing. I lowered my word goal twice, because of life happenings. I'll be graduating and having a graduation piano recital and the preparation for both has been catching up on me. But during Nano I realized that writing is a fun and a relaxing outlet for me. I had so much fun developing my characters and creating wicked awesome plot twists, drinking gallons of tea and listing to playlist after playlist of music. It was such a great experience and despite, getting only four hours of sleep some nights, not meeting my goals, and freaking out about word counts I say it was worth it! 

3. Your story is important.
Sometimes I felt like, there was no point to my story. Why do I need to write this story if this material has already been written about before? But, your story does matter. Maybe its been written by others, but it hasn't been written by you. I'm writing about post World War Two, and for awhile I was feeling like "seriously, whats the point of this?" Hundreds of people have written about World War Two, does the world really need another novel? But I realized that I have my own story to tell, and that every person adds something different and unique to every story.

Synopsis for my novel, Negative Time: 

Two sisters set out in search of the unknown. 
One boy chooses to break the rules. 
One man attempts to redeem his past. 
And one young astronomer discovers that we all are the same inside no matter what color we are on the outside. 

1945. Germany has been taken captive by the Soviets. Their cities lie in ruins, and the lives they once knew, seem to have vanished. But, a mist this time of pain and anger, Briella and Eve Fischer, two orphaned twin sisters, set out on a journey like no other, they have experienced. A quest in search of their freedom, and their dreams, in a time and place where both seem to be forgotten. They discover hope, the value of friendship, and family, the real meaning of love and the simplicity of humanity. 

Snippets from my novel

Jump, Schneider!” an officer yelled from below.

It was Officer Heinz. His face raged a vibrant red up against his soft blonde hair underneath his black billed hat, as he yelled once again, “Schneider, jump!”

The ladder seemed to sway underneath Roman, who was standing on the top step, looking down at the large Nazi flag that was being held by four officers fifteen feet below the top of the ladder. Officer Heinz stood farther back from the flag observing the boys. Romans stomach churned, and he became dizzy. He looked back down below at the other boys. He spotted Rodger who stood, his arms crossed, his face holding an expression of one who thought himself braver than anyone. Some of the boys looked up at him, judgment pasted on their faces, a few gave him glances of sympathy, and others faces held nervousness and fear, for they knew it would be their turn soon to put their trust in the red flag with the swastika. 

For the last time, Schneider, JUMP!” The young officer screamed, his face turning a shade redder than before.

C'mon Roman. You can do this.” Roman sighed, closing his eyes. He clenched his teeth, and made his hands into fists. Roman elevated his right foot and stuck it out over the edge. He took a step out into thin air.


Alfred Briggs stood on the swaying bridge, his hands tightly gripping the discolored medal railing in front of him. His knuckles where white, and he clenched his teeth attempting to keep back his tears. He ran his hands through his gray hair, repeating the words, “I killed him, I killed him.” over and over again in his mind. The river rushed below him, and he only wished this feeling of guilt he had carried all day would wash away with the quick rushing water. He didn't know how he would deal with this his whole life. Sure, Alfred had killed other men before Hans Fischer. Death was no stranger to him. But this man was different. As his corporal pulled the trigger on his pistol, Alfred had seen so much on the mans face. Regret, love, fear of the unknown. Then after the cold, lead bullet had pierced his heart, he witnessed a peace in his eyes he had never seen before. He didn't deserve to die, no matter what their cause was, or what Hitler thought.

I shot that man. I killed that man.” These words repeated over and over in Alfred's mind. He ripped off his coat and threw it onto the well worn boards of the bridge. The dark, black swastika on his arm band fell so that it was in full view of Alfred. He kicked his coat over the edge of the bridge, and into the rushing water. The rapids took the coat under, and it disappeared. He thought of the twins. He saw their eyes full of innocent tears.

The faded pink sun, sunk behind purple mountains, and the man with the guilty conscience, still stood on the bridge, contemplating if he should jump into the rushing river below, or if he should walk back to town. Back to a lie? Or on to death? 

The gymnasium was gone. Bricks from the gym scattered the soggy earth, mixed with shingles from the roof of the school, and shattered pieces of glass from the windows. The oak tree that stood among small fur trees and birch, had been stripped of its branches, and a battered trunk stood towering above the people below. Its bark had been clawed off, and it bled sap.

Roman left the group. He needed time alone. He walked back into the lopsided building, still in a daze, and wondered if this was all a bad dream. He pinched himself, but he was awake, like he had suspected. He knew it wasn't a dream, no matter how hard his heart denied it.

All of a sudden Roman remembered his secrets. His bare feet quickened their walk into a run, his heart raced and he bounded though the crumbling wall. He rushed into the hall, to see Stewie sitting there in a daze, rubbing his eyes. The white haired boy searched for his glasses with the cracked lens, feeling about the floor with his hands. Roman continued to his dormitory. He rounded a corner, and turned into his room. There he met the face of Officer Heinz who was standing in the middle of the floor, among the wreckage. He held a leather bound sketch book with the words Roman Schneider embroidered on the cover, and held between his fingers, was a red pencil.  The officer looked up to meet the face of the boy, still in his white nightshirt. Roman's heart dropped.


Eve lay in the bed she shared with Bri. The heat from Briella's body, warmed Eve until she couldn't take it anymore. She felt her sleeping sisters forehead. She had a fever, and her temperature was high. Sweat droplets freckled her face and neck, and ran down onto the sheets and pillowcase. She needed water.

Eve stepped out of bed, the mattress coils creaked as she did. She swept her unruly blonde cowlick behind her ear, and out of her eyes. Eve padded quietly to the window so not to wake Mara and Iris, their roommates, from their sleep. She knew she couldn't go downstairs, for she would awake the sisters. Her only chance was to escape out the window, and down to the well. Eve pushed the fluttering curtains aside, and placed her hands on the window sill. She looked down the brick side of the building where a trellis with growing ivy vines was securely fastened to the brick wall. With adventure in her eyes, Eve swung her legs out the window.


Pretty much this meme, ^^^^ IS THE MOST ACCURATE THING ON THE PLANET. I am so glad camp is over, but at the same time, I am so ready to go another round! Bring on CampNanoJuly!!

Which snippet is your favorite?
Did you win Nano?
What did you learn from Camp Nano?

Monday, May 1, 2017

#April2017 || I CUT MY HAIR SUPER SHORT!!! + gelato + senior prom + helium balloons + swing dancing with a cowboy

Awesome Stuff

  • Beat Julia in a word war! Woot! 
  • Getting a good grade in math. Always good. 
  • Being surprised by my lovely, friends that randomly brought me gelato at my house while my family was away. Love these girls!
  • Practicing a piano trio for the first time, with the two other graduates I'm doing a recital with next Sunday. So fun! 
  • You Can't Stop The Beat from Hairspray (my new favorite dance song).
  • Watching Moana with my bros.
  • Senior prom was amazing! I had such a fun time dancing with all my friends and celebrating my senior year with all my homeschool peeps! All those dance classes have been paying off! 
  • Loving my new hairstyle. I got about 7 inches cut off, and my head feels so light! I love it, and its so much easier to curl! 
  • Playing checkers with my eight year old brother who beats me every time.
  • 'Madam Librarian', and 'Trouble' from the Music Man. 
  • Going on walks with Taryn down to the pond.
  • Secret ice cream stash.
  • Changing the covers of my Pinterest boards.
  • Getting emotionally attached to my novel characters. They are so amazing! 
  • Being told my poem should be made into a song. 
  • Meeting up with childhood friends.

Not-So-Awesome Stuff

  • Realizing there are kids my age training for the Olympics and I'm still 'pulling' on 'push' doors.
  • Knowing Camp Nano is over. *cries* 
  • Crying over the Phantom of the Opera soundtrack. Thats how pitiful my life is.
  • When your foundation powder goes up your nose. 
  • Swing dancing with this cowboy guy, then accidentally knocking off his cowboy hat and stepping on it. *cringes* It was dark in there. I couldn't help it...
  • Breathing in about three balloons worth of helium, and feeling super sick. 
Awkward Stuff

  • When you realize that when you eat a lollypop you are pretty much swallowing your own flavored saliva.
  • Walking through a spider web and suddenly feeling like a ninja.
  • I was at the coffee shop working on my novel, when I took a break to drink my coffee and give my brain a break, when I hear from the next table over, where these four old guys where sitting,"Ya know fellas, I wish women where more like men. Like, I carry all my stuff in my pocket. THEY NEED A WHOLE BAG!!!" *almost chokes on coffee* *chuckles* 
  • Singing 'You'll Be Back' from Hamilton in the mist of my family who doesn't realize the historical significance to the song. "And I'll kill your friends and remind you of my love! Da da da da da!" *blank stares* "What are you singing?" 

  • Calling the Auburn University Hotline, then chickening out when the lady answered the phone. 
  • When you realize your smile is so fake......
  • Realizing that I am such a nerd because I can sing all the parts of 'One Day More' from Les Mis.

April Faves

Goals From April Completed

Read one book
I read A Room With A View by E.M Forster. Gonna watch the movie now! 

Get done with science for the year
Nooo, didn't complete this, but I am super super close!

Practice piano more 
Yussss, I did this.

Finish the abs challenge 
Completed this! Woot!

Goals For May
  • Work on editing what I already wrote for Nano April.
  • Finish my NYC scrapbook.
  • Finish my Authors Note Series with a letter from Janette Oke.
  • Get a book of my poems published through Lulu.

So, tell me about your month!