Monday, November 7, 2016

10 Epic Shakespeare Insults That Every Shakespearian Should Know




You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!

Go, prick thy face, and over-red thy fear, thou lily-liver’d boy.

O, there has been much throwing about of brains.

There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune.

Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage.

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed.

I will speak daggers to her.

I desire us to be better strangers.

I do wish thou were a dog, that I might love thee something.

The tartness of thy face sours ripe grapes.

You, minion, are too saucy.

I looovvee Shakespeare. He's LYFE. His romance is on point, his sense of irony is riotous, his plots are simply genius, and his characters are seriously to die for. omgosh.  If you want mayhem, poison, blackmail, passion, death, romance, explosives and sword fighting, Shakespeare is for you. Give him a try. Reading his stuff isn't really so bad as everyone says. Especially if you recite the dialogue (more like scream the dialogue) when your home alone in the mirror. Now, about these insults...I would never tell someone that I wish they were a dog, so I could love them something, with serious intent.....well I don't think I would... *low menacing chuckle*



But, they are fun to use jokingly. Plus, no one will probably even know what your talking about, or that you even insulted them, bc thats the beauty of Shakespearian. 

20 comments:

  1. *laughs* MY FAVORITE ONE IS THE WIT ONE. I think I shall use it xD

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  2. I AM SHAKESPEARE TRASH.
    I really am. Macbeth gives me so many feelings. lol. and FREAKING ROMEO AND JULIET. I saw a production of it and I was so freaking shook after reading it.
    he really isnt as bad as people think he is. its really not that hard to read. I took a Shakespeare centered english class this semester, and by the 3rd play we went through, I didnt even need to consult the notes on the side anymore. that class really has helped me appreciate Shakespeare so much more.

    also, you should go on the Half Price Books website and check out their Shakespeare insult mug. its the greatest thing Ive ever seen

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    1. SAAMMMEE MACBETH IS JUST GOALS! AND ROMEO AND JULIET!! AHH I FOUND ANOTHER SHAKESPEARIAN!!! GAHHH
      Oh yes, I need that mug! XD

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  3. oh my goshhhh. i was giggling through this whole post. I LOVE SHAKESPEARE INSULTS. I seriously want to memorize these so I can jokingly use them on my family. the actual best. XD

    katie grace
    a writer's faith

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    Replies
    1. Ohh yes, I use these all the time on my family XD

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  4. Shakespeare insults are my fave, and it's great that no one except for us Shakespearean get them until another person who understands it comes along. Also, I like Shakespeare's romance (NOT Romeo and Juliet though), especially:

    "Doubt thou the stars are fire, / Doubt that the sun doth move, / Doubt truth to be a liar, / But never doubt I love."

    xoxo Morning

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    Replies
    1. Wut? You don't like Romeo and Juliet!? Hee hee...thats like my favorite one! XD
      OHHH YESS YESS!! GAH I'M DEAD! THAT QUOTE! GAHHHhhhh...

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  5. So I just found your blog and I think it's kind of amazing okay?

    But anyway, yes, Shakespeare insults are the best. Shakespeare in general is the best. I got to play Hermia in a production of A Midsummer Night's Dream, so my favorite shakespearean insult has to be "You canker-blossom."

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    1. Thank you so much, Hannah! <3 Your so kind!
      Ohh that is so exciting! I would LOVE to act in a Shakespeare play some day!
      ha ha I love that insult!

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  6. Hahha, these are aweseome! Totally need to use some of these. XD
    http://everythingisbetterwithpolkadots.blogspot.com/

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  7. Wow, I love these, I need to read some Shakespeare (I've only read Shakespeare retellings, but not his actual works..)
    These insults are amazing though, so witty and well thought out..I love the fifth one about wits :-)
    -Jollygirl @ Reflections of a Jolly Girl

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    Replies
    1. Thanks for your comment, Jollygirl!
      Shakesphere is da best!

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  8. These are fab and provided a much needed laugh!
    "I desire us to be better strangers" is definitely my favourite. I'm studying the Shakespearean era in school - it's such an interesting topic!

    Lauren | Sincerely, Lauren Emily

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